I learned a lot from the experience mentioned in my previous blog:
1. Trust no one (this is not a new learning experience just a very painful reminder)
2. No one cares.
People know you're struggling both family and friend but they will still ignore you. I've realized that perhaps talking about me being homeless might have been uncomfortable for them to hear but in those times we as human being need to put those feelings aside and do what needs to be done for the people you say you love. So maybe you couldn't help financially but a phone call, a text, anything at all to show them you care is better than doing nothing at all and proving that you don't. I have never felt so low in my life, so helpless, so useless, so numb. I suffer from anxiety and depression so my natural thought is always that people don't care and my worst fear is having that thought proven. You proved it. I hope you can live with that.
The good news is that we finally found a home but the wounds of this experience is so deep and infected that I don't think it will ever heal. I want to move on but I can't. I want to die but I just can't.
No one helped us.
Not a single person.
We crawled out of the abyss on bloodied knees.